It's August!

We are about 30 minutes away from August 1, 2010.  If Camille is born within the next 31 days, all 4 (chin) Ng family member will be born in August.

Chin - August 21

Bao - August 15

Penelope - August 19

Camille - August ???

Camille's official date is September 4th, but nobody believes it will take that long.  Docs have been worried about a pre-term labor since Bao was 29 weeks along.  Camille is now 35 weeks.

Go August birthdays!

MacNut Week 34

Technically, this is what's going on this week:

• MacNut is the weight of a cantaloupe - ~17.72 inches and 4.73 pounds.
• Your child has now an excellent chance of survival outside the womb.
• Fat accumulations plumps up the arms and legs this week.
• Eyes opened when awake and closed when sleeping.
• The fingernails are now completely formed.
• Your baby may have already turned to a head down position in preparation for birth (yep!).
• The skull bones are still pretty flexible and not completely joined to help to ease exit out of the narrow birth canal. 
• The baby's skin is also becoming less wrinkled.
• Thanks to antibodies crossing the placenta the baby is developing immunities to mild infections. 

Physical:

• Weight: 153 lb (+27)
• Belly circumference: 39.75 in (+9.25)
• Fundal height: 32 in 
• Dilation: 2.5cm
• Effacement: 30-40% (*phew*...I think last week, I was checked during a contraction, that's why my cervix was so short)
• Station: -1
• Okay, don't tell anyone, but since my blood glucose level has been within range for so long, I have decided to significantly cut down on testing.  Like, once a day if I felt like I had a big meal.
• The joints in my hands have started aching a bit.  Fluid build-up is pretty typical toward the end of pregnancy.  Although my hands don't look any plumper.  My feet, on the other hand (haha, why would feet be on the other hand?), have been pretty plump unless I am paying close attention to putting them up.

Spiritual & emotional:

• Caleb's memorial service was as wonderful as a life celebration could be.  You know how when someone passes away, people would say, "S/he is in a better place"?  And sure, sometimes I feel like they could be in heaven.  But, who knows?!  Well, I am convinced that Caleb is in heaven.  No doubt!
• After the funeral, as Chin & I were driving back to Washington, I had to exclaim, "Satan lost!!"  Caleb's life and death were both glowing testimonies of God's faithfulness to those who put their trust in Him.  I can't claim to read God's mind.  But if I were to guess, I'd say He's pretty pleased with Caleb...and with our family.
• The day of Caleb's funeral was also our wedding anniversary - 7 years!  We didn't really get a chance to celebrate, but it felt fine not doing something "special" for this day.
• The days following our return to Washington were difficult.  I had to make a plan to catch up on school work.  "Did you make a spreadsheet," my friend Krista inquired.  Why, how did you know?!  I did.  With 4 tabs, in fact - one for each course I was taking.  The spreadsheet looked intimidating, but not impossible.  I worked and worked and worked 'til the wee hours of the morning and, because I usually can't sleep through the night with this hip pain, I would wake up early to get more work done.  So exhausted.  I would often skip meals without realizing what I'd done.
• Then came Thursday morning, completely exhausted after only four hours of sleep and looking ahead at a long day, I started praying.  I broke down.  What was I doing?!  Is it worth it to risk my health and Camille's well-being for some classes?  Then, I made a very difficult decision: to withdraw from all my classes this quarter.  That's 11 credits.  A full load.  Full tuition through Educational Outreach = $7.5K a quarter.  Yes, "I" made that decision.  And this decision influences subsequent quarters, too, as many of my classes needed to be taken sequentially.  This meant that I would need to wait a full year until next June to come back and complete these courses.  So, the decision to drop the current courses meant taking a leave of absence until June 2011.
• When Chin woke up and was in the bathroom getting ready, I came back into the room from the office and just sat on the stool at the foot of our bed, sobbing uncontrollably.  When Chin finally saw me, he was so concerned.  I explained to him that I had made this decision.  I was not consulting with him, but merely telling him about this life-changing decision that I had made on own.  Over the next few days, Chin had a difficult time embracing this decision.  Not because he disagreed with me, but that he wasn't allowed to be involved in the decision-making process.  I understand how he felt...and I felt badly that I did not include him.  But I also felt that it was a decision that had to be made quickly.  And Chin's personality does not lend itself to making quick decisions.  After a few days and lots of praying, Chin came to terms with the decision and agreed that it was absolutely the right one for our family.
• My advisers, professors, and classmates have been very supportive of this decision.  I am so thankful.  I'm still a bit nervous about paying the tuition for this quarter, though.
• Overall, I feel a great sense of relief after making this decision.  I get to rest for the remainder of my pregnancy.  And then I get to be a full-time mom to Camille until next June!

MacNut Week 33

Technically, this is what's going on this week:

• MacNut is the heft of a pineapple - ~17.20 inches and 4.23 pounds.
• The early baby fuzz, lanugo, is disappearing now and being replaced by actual hair. The nails of your baby are now long enough to reach to the tip of the fingers or beyond and may need trimming as soon as they are born. They may scratch their face even before birth.
• The baby is using her lungs to practice breathing by inhaling amniotic fluid. Your baby is drinking about a pint of amniotic fluid a day now and urinating the same amount (eeew...she's drinking her own urine!)
• You may gain a pound a week for the rest of your pregnancy.  Half of your weight gain will go directly to your baby.
• Do not stop eating or start skipping meals as your weight increases (umm...okay). Both you and your baby need the calories and nutrition you receive from a healthy diet.

Physical:

• Weight: 151 lb (+25)
• Belly circumference: 39.50 in (+9.00)
• Fundal height: 32 in (she's still pretty low down there, but at least there's some growth!)
• Dilation: 2-3cm
• Effacement: 70% (yikes!)
• Station: -2
• Estimated weight of baby: nearly 5 pounds!
• More contractions this week.  One night, they came regularly at 5 minutes apart for about 40 minutes.  I had a safe feeling that everything was going to be okay.  So I just tried to go back to sleep...and was able to.  I was told the next day that if I were to go in to the hospital that night, they would not have done anything to stop labor.  (But I think that varies from one practitioner to another.  I would ask for a tocolytic.)
• At the check-up on Wednesday, my midwife estimated that Camille is almost 5 pounds.  I don't know if that's even possible.  That's pretty chunky for this stage, right?
• My gestational diabetes has been very well-controlled.  Even after splurging at Fat Burger and Old Country Buffet (I did not go lightly, boys & girls), my levels were still well within the normal range!

Spiritual & emotional:

• With very mixed feelings, I bring you the news that my nephew Caleb died on Monday morning (7/19).  He was 12 years old.
• I have mixed feelings about his death because I am extremely sad (maybe even depressed), regretful, jealous, and happy.  
• I am sad because he's my nephew!  He and his brother Joshua were the first grandkids for my parents.  We lived with them for their first few years.  I was the expert at extracting snot from their nose and I was very proud of it.  Twelve is not an age where you expect to see your loved one go.
• I regret not seeing him before that damn shunt was placed in his head.  The surgery that caused him to have the blank stare, mask-like face, and severe muscle weakness.  I regret that even though I created an account for him and I put together a compilation of songs for him on Grooveshark, I never got a chance to give it to him.  I regret that I never Skyped with him.
• I am jealous because he gets to be in heaven.
• I am happy because he gets to be in heaven.  But I do miss him a lot.
• I'm not sure how things work up there, but I hope he was able to find his cousins -- David, Benjamin, and Penelope.
• Chin & I are heading down to Oregon tonight to be with family and to prepare for the memorial service on Monday morning.

MacNut Week 32

The disheveled look of week 32.

The big milestone this week is that if Camille were to arrive, I don't need to go to a high-risk facility (like Swedish or UWMC).  I can deliver at GHC-Capitol Hill's Family Beginnings Unit.  On that note, I have been a little reluctant to tell people that we're having our baby at Group Health Seattle.  Mostly because some people's reactions have been, "Oh, really?  Do you have to?  Do you have Group Health insurance?"  The answer is Yes, No, and No.  We don't have GH insurance but we are choosing to have our baby here because it is a wonderful place to have a midwife-assisted birth.  We are working with a fantastic group of midwives through NeighborCare Health who have continually shown themselves to be competent, compassionate, and overall warm & caring group of women!  So, I don't have to deliver at GHC-Capitol Hill.  But I choose to because it seems to be the best choice for our family.

Technically, this is what's going on this week:

• MacNut is the weight of a large jicama - ~ 16.69 inches and 3.75 pounds.
• The diameter of the head is almost 4 inches (10cm).
• Under the skin the fat layer is getting thicker.
• The toenails and fingernails are completely formed.
• During this time the baby sleeps most of the day. 
• The uterus is getting to be a small space for the baby to move about, so you may have noticed a decrease in your baby's movements (slightly...but not by a lot, she's still pretty kicky!). 
• The baby is still trying to move frequently but she just does not have enough room. The baby will turn its head from side to side and move her hands. 

Physical:

• Weight: 149 lb (+23)
• Belly circumference: 39.50 in (+9.00)
• Fundal height: 30 in (she's pretty looooow down there)
• I started having some "painful" contractions starting Wednesday morning.  The contractions woke me up and, even though they were irregular, each lasted for 1-3 minutes.  They weren't very painful, just felt like cramping.  But they were definitely different.
• Not much else to report except that I had my first appointment with a physiotherapist this week.  Her name is Christine Merritt.  At first, I thought, "Hmm...okay, this is all too 'woo woo' for me!"  But after just a couple of days, I felt much better!  I think the thing I appreciate the most about Christine is her ability to listen and her focus on patient education.  For instance, she taught me how to turn in bed and even made me practice while I was at her clinic so she could observe.  She also taught me how to walk...."Just like a duck!  Don't be afraid to waddle.  You're pregnant.  Just tuck in your tail bone and waddle.  You'll feel much better.  Carry your belly if you need to."  It worked!

Week 32 pregnancy face.  I look different, huh?  

Chin took this picture to show me how lop-sided my ears are.

Chin took this shot of my belly while I was brushing my teeth.  End of week 32.

Spiritual & emotional:

• A few days nearing the end of week 32, Caleb stopped talking completely.  I did not know this until a few days after the fact.  And I regret not Skyping with him.  Full of regrets :(
• I can't say much about this week.  It has been a non-productive, emotionally painful week.

MacNut Week 31

Technically, this is what's going on this week:

• MacNut is the weight of four navel oranges - ~ 16.18 inches and 3.31 pounds.
• She should more than double her weight again between now and birth.
• The eyes have now completely opened and are responding to light and darkness.
• A loud noise near you may cause your little one to jump.
• Baby's lungs and digestive tract are very near to being mature.

Physical:

• Weight: 149 lb (+23)
• Belly circumference: 39.25 in (+8.75)
• Fundal height: 29 in (Yep, still at 29!  I think my uterus is just really squashy.)
• Cravings: I haven't really craved anything during this pregnancy.  But recently, I've just been craving a lot of sweets!  Oh help me, Lord!
• I have noticed that my voice has changed a bit as I get bigger.  I guess that makes sense since all of my visceral content is pushed up and my poor diaphragm is hanging on to dear life!
• I've been trying to keep my legs elevated the best I can.  They are a little "fluffy," but not too bad if you take into consideration how hot it has been the past few days.
• I went swimming three times this week!  Thank God for the pool in our complex.  It's pretty cloudy and there are quite a few dead bugs & leaves, but boy, it is niiiice to be in the water and feel weightless.  Side note: I can no longer float on my back.  Which is weird, since I always imagined that my rotund belly could be used as a flotation device. :-/
• My midwife decided to do another fFN test this week and it turned out positive.  Urgh.  I know in my heart it doesn't mean anything, but it's just another thing.  I was even asked to come in to get monitored on Thursday.  It was a complete waste of time!  Anyway, next time I go in to the hospital, I'd better already be crowning!
  

Spiritual & emotional:

• It's hard to believe that in just 6 weeks (at week 37), Camille will be considered full term.  I will still have one more week of school left in the quarter...but she can come anytime after week 38! :)
• I almost forgot to add this part because it occurred early on this week, but I had my first baby shower!!  The baby shower was thrown by my sisters and a friend, Annette VoLam.  It was a really fun time with friends and family.  Annette is an amazing cake/cookie maker and the food at the party was amazing!  Camille and I had a great time :)
• Some people have asked us this week if we felt "ready" or what else we think we might want to do before Camille's debut.  To be quite honest, I don't know!  I don't think we can ever realistically be "ready" for this next stage in life.  And I'm okay with that.  I'd be more okay with that, though, once we get a couple of new dressers to put all her junk in!
• Self consciousness...Okay, so before I got really big, I thought, "I don't want to be one of those pregnant women who feel ashamed of the way they look in their gravid state."  And, I don't feel ashamed at all.  I love my big belly!  But there are subtle ways that I feel self conscious about my pregnancy.  For instance, I feel self conscious that freakin' relaxin started releasing big time starting at week 21 when I started having pelvic pain...which resulted in "the waddle" that early on in pregnancy.  So, yeah, sometimes I feel self conscious about my waddle!  Or about the fact that I have to walk a lot slower because my hips hurt like a mo' fo'.  I also feel a little self conscious of my stretch marks when I wear a swim suit.  Those are pretty normal feelings, I realize, but I just didn't think I had such poor self image...since I love myself so much.
• Emotionally, this week has not been as bad as some of the previous weeks.  Although one night, we received news that Caleb was no longer able to chew or swallow solid foods.  This news was a deep stab to my heart.  I lived with Joshua & Caleb (twins) for the first three years of their lives.  I was there when they were introduced to solids.  I just don't even want to think about it...

MacNut Week 30

I am 3/4 of the way through my pregnancy! In merely 7 weeks, Camille will be full term!

Technically, this is what's going on this week:

• MacNut is the weight of a large cabbage (sheesh, how's that for arbitrary!!) - ~ 15.71 inches and 2.91 pounds.
• She will gain about half a pound a week until week 38 (whoa, Nelly!).
• The head is almost 3.5 inches (8cm) in diameter.
• The feet are nearly 2.5 inches (6cm) long.
• Eyebrows and eyelashes are fully developed, and hair on the head is getting thicker. 
• Head and body are now proportioned like a newborn. 
• Hands are now fully formed and fingernails are growing, eyelids are opening and closing. 
• The wrinkled skin is becoming smoother now.
• The baby controls her own body temperature.

Physical:

• Weight: 148 lb (+22)
• Belly circumference: 38.75 in (+8.25)
• Fundal height: 29 in 
• Hospitalization - *sigh*:
• On Monday night, I went out on a walk with Chin and started having a contraction  (moderate, I would say; not strong but definitely not mild).   After 20 mins, it was still going continuously!  I called the midwife on-call and was told to come in (GH-Capitol Hill).
• On the way to the hospital, the ctxs stopped (so it lasted about 30 mins).
• Got there and got put on the monitor.  The midwife who cared for me was Nicola - a MEPN3 student!  She was fantastic!  Which gives me a lot of hope :)
• After not finding anything too disturbing, they decided to let us go and said, "Wait here, we'll give you your d/c instructions."
• While we were waiting, I started having another ctx.  I had Nicola feel my belly and she said, "Let's get a urine culture and do a pelvic exam."
• Pelvic exam indicated I was 1cm dilated, cervix short & soft.  The dilation isn't a big deal...but the short & soft cervix worried the midwife a bit as this could be a sign of impending labor :(  Doh!  We almost got away!
• Admitted to the hospital.
• 1 shot of Betamethasone at 1am 6/29.
• Ultrasound in the morning indicated that my cervix was short...but not waaay short.  U/s @ 19 wks showed my cervix being at 3.5cm.  U/s this week showed a range between 2.6cm and 3.5cm; where 2.6cm was during a ctx.  I was told that they don't start really worrying until I'm shorter than 2.5cm.
• The u/s also showed that Camille is doing very well.  She measured at our exact estimated due date and weighed a little over 3 pounds.  The u/s tech was a former professor of the trade so I had lots of questions for him.  We checked out the AFI (18), reconfirmed that Camille has girl parts (checked!), examined whether the umbilical cord was tangled (it wasn't), and even checked to see if she had a cleft palate or lip (she doesn't!).  Hehe...it sounds like paranoia, but we were just curious.  Chin was so excited that we got to see her again via u/s.  Womb with a view!! :D
• 10pm 6/29: Fetal fibronectin (fFN) test and another pelvic exam.  Cervix remains the same as last check. 
  
• 2nd shot of Betamethasone at 1am 6/30.
• fFN returned negative at 1:30am!  At which point I asked to be discharged immediately! :)  I wanted to get good sleep at home.  Also, did I mention that I was on this excruciatingly ridiculous ADA diet?!  $*(&#@(^) $*&#*(@!!!
• Before the hospitalization saga, I was doing very well physically.  I was getting enough sleep and my hips were even feeling quite good.  Being in the hospital for two nights and sleeping on that darn bed threw everything off kilter.  *hmmph*
• I think that's also why I actually lost one pound this week.  That and the fact that I'm more carb-conscious.  Which is probably a good thing.
• Camille's kicks are becoming more and more, well, shocking.  Some of her movements are like, "Whoa! Quit digging your bony-whatever into my [insert name of an internal organ]!!"
• My feet are less fluffy this week due to the cooler weather...and being at the flippin' hospital for two days, as you can see here:

Spiritual & emotional:

• Even when I called the midwife on Monday night, I didn't feel like I should have to be admitted.  But, I guess the healthcare team was just trying to be more cautious.  I really didn't like to be at the hospital and it really bummed me out.  I fell behind in school and I hate that feeling!
• Being in the hospital for a couple of days was annoying.  But it also gave Chin & me a chance to be together around the clock (thanks to the generosity of his teammates who allowed him to be with me)...which was very nice.
• We continue to fervently pray for my nephew Caleb.  He makes a little bit of progress each day and it seems that his quality of life is quite good.  I think he's getting a little more frustrated this week, though, as he is coming to grips with things that his body is not capable of doing. :(
• Chin & I are driving down to Longview and Portland this weekend.  My sisters & AnnetteVoLam are throwing me a baby shower on Saturday.  We will also get to see Caleb.  Mixing such strongly opposing emotions is a little stressful for me...

 Camille Ng at 30 weeks and 3 days.  Her right fist is on her nose.